Gil (fenyx) wrote,

  • Mood:
  • Music:


I love you so fucking much, it kills me. It isn't fair that you are married, that I have to see you every day, and that I am trying to date a man that would be perfect for me, except for the fact that I LOVE YOU--

Tell me--how am I supposed to do this? Do you have the answers?

When I speak to you, everything I felt comes rushing back to me. I thought I had made it all go do you see why I avoid you like I do?

I need to fall in love with someone I can have a life with. I don't know how to do this...because right there you are, in my mind, all the time, and in my heart.

I know you're my soulmate, and I can never have you...

I don't know how people live this way. I have always been so proud that I do what I want, and that I take care of things. This is the one thing in my life I will never be able to fix or make right. I hate that I will be like the rest of the world one day, hiding behind a bunch of lies, and living my life with a person I don't love like I should.

If I had the balls, I swear I would ask you today to leave her, I would tell this man to go on his way, and I would ask you to spend the rest of your life with ME.

What would you say to me? Do you love me the same way?

If you did...maybe you would have already done what I wish I could do.


  • Hello?

    Is anyone out there? I'm seeing a few people back on LJ, and thought I'd drop a post. I have been on and off LJ in past couple of years but mostly…

  • So much

    So much to write about it, but so little time. My uncle passing, school, life, my health. I need to be working though. *sigh* I think everyone who…

  • 40

    Today I say goodbye to my thirties. Fuck. I had a lot I wanted to write down, but all of a sudden, it doesn't matter. Maybe I'll get to it…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.