anxiousWill: We all have it comin', Kid.
I've done my share of dirt, but I guess we all have, right? I'm an a-hole, I didn't go to that wedding last week and I'm considering skipping this one. Ugh, since I RSVP'd to this one I suppose I'm going to force my ass to go. Other than the groom and the bride I'm not going to know a lot of people there and since I think I'm going alone, it's probably going to be a long and awkward evening. At least I found out no one's really going to be wearing suits, which in a way is worse because I really don't know what to wear now. If I do take my suit, I'll be overdressed, but I don't want to be underdressed. God I'm idiot. This is how my brain works I overthink everything and get all worked up over stupid shit that is probably second nature to most people. What do I get them? How much should I spend? I feel like I'm retarded or something. I'm thirty years old and there are still many social situations where I'm clueless. I don't go to many weddings, usually they're family so it's a lot easier and we've just got different customs. Eh. How old am I? I swear to Christ I'm always going to be a child in a man's body. *shakes head*
So I've been watching a lot of movies lately, I really don't have a whole lot going on, obviously. Anyway, I watched Unforgiven this morning, damn that's a great flick. An amazing cast, great lines, beautiful landscapes. It's also complex. Is Will really a good guy? Is this about redemption or has he found it? Are there any "good guys" in the movie? What is the value of a man's life?
Damnit, I just thought about how I'm going to meet everyone's parents tonight. Fuck, next time I even mention a wedding invitation someone smack me around. It's not like I'm shy, I just don't like people. Heh. Well, not lately anyway, nothing personal of course. I should drink before I go. Where's my flask?
Anyway, Unforgiven, good stuff.
Hmm...yeah.
I think I'm going to go live in a shack on top of some mountain someday, maybe in Mexico.
EDIT: I think I'm going to end up wearing a suit...sonuvabitch...
