Gil (fenyx) wrote,

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It's long, but don't be afraid. (ha, ha that's not the first time I've said that)

Damn, guess I've got to do the obligatory St. Patrick's Day color scheme, don't I? What is my theme right now anyway, I forget. Right it's just simple, red and black. I'll get to it, like I'll get to the dozens of things I need to be doing. It's like I don't have enough time for anything but in reality, that's all I have.


I don't know where it goes. TV? The Web? Who knows? Probably a little of both. Before I know it, I've wasted the whole morning and I haven't even started my errands. I sent out another resume, I called the furniture people and I'm still waiting for UPS, so I guess I've been semi-productive. I don't know, I won't bore everyone with the details. I will, however, bore you with my weekend recap.

Saturday (2.23)

We had yet another appointment at St. Jerome's. (That's where we're supposed to be getting married this summer in case you haven't been keeping up.) We were supposed to bring two witnesses as a formality. We had to do some paperwork and they needed to sign off on it. Or at least that's what I thought. We pick up our friend Mark and my brother Caesar meets us at the rectory. The deacon is there and we start filling out the paperwork. Mark and Caesar also have to fill out paperwork. It was somewhat tedious, mind you, this is the same church where I was not only baptized, but also where I made my first communion. Now, Melissa isn't baptized and I never got confirmed because we moved when I was in 8th grade. The deacon kind of scares us because he doesn't know what is going to happen because of it. I'm still feeling pretty confident and thinking that's it's all posturing and just a matter of formalities but Melissa starts to worry. The deacon asks us questions and tells us some stories, he's friendly and I get the feeling he's trying to put Melissa at ease by showing us how "cool" or non-traditional he is. My brother doesn't really seem to like him. (Surprise, surprse)

After some time we finish up and he says that he'd get back to us. We race Mark to his appointment and Caesar heads home. As we're dropping mark off we see that a furniture store is having a moving sale so we go in to take a look. We end up buying a nice dining room table and chairs. I then have the idea to have lunch at Las Mananitas since we're in the neighborhood. It's my Godfather's restaurant and I figure that I'd stop by and say hey and tell him the good news. We have a great lunch and I talk to my Godfather (UPS just got here, give me a second, okay I'm back) for a while. He surprises us with a cute desert.

It didn't taste too bad either. I swear I needed a cigarette afterwards, heh. As we were finishing up Deacon Ward called again. I guess there was another form I needed to sign. Since Melissa isn't Catholic we need to ask the Church permission for me to be able to marry a "non-believer". It's kind of amusing, but Mel doesn't think so, I mean it is, but it isn't. We head back to the rectory and get everything squared away. I think he brought it up earlier, but at one point he asked us how often we attend mass or where our parish is. Of course I rarely go to church, and I tried to mumble something about our recent move. Anyway he brings up the point or questions me about why I want to get married in the church. I don't have to, I can just get married by a justice of the peace.

He's right, and I didn't have a great answer. It's a combination of tradition, of wanting to make my parents happy, and of always having the dream or idea of getting married in that church. I also like the idea of getting married in the eyes of the church because once you're married, that's it. There's no divorcing in the eyes of the Lord. I want to get married in the house of sweet baby Jesus. I might not be the best Catholic around, but who is these days? I don't know one person my age who attends religious services on a regular basis.

Then I'm thinking why are we getting grilled. My nephew just got baptized there last year and he was born out of wedlock. They've got priests molesting kids, fewer and fewer people in the parish, and other problems and they're giving me a hard time. I don't know, at some points it feel like it's not worth it. We still have to attend a pre-cana on Saturday and we just got a message from him that I need to sign yet another form. I was just there yesterday because they couldn't find my baptismal records. I don't know...

It ended up being a long day and we headed home.

Sunday (2.24)

We had planned on doing some grocery shopping and hitting Target at some point. We also wanted to try and go to the dog show at McCormick Place but we ended up doing a lot of wedding stuff online. Melissa wasn't feeling 100% and I was feeling lazy so we ended up ordering out and vegging out the whole day.

The Oscars eventually came on and so did the red carpet coverage. We watched that pretty much for the rest of the night. Jon Stewart did a great job, but overall they were very "eh". Brad Renfro wasn't acknowledged and neither was Whoopi Goldberg along with Steve Martin as presenters. There were a lot of montages and the musical numbers sucked, especially since three of the songs were from that friggin' Disney movie, Enchanted. I'm glad the song that won best song did. Umm...yeah. I was pretty psyched that Cody Diablo won for best screenplay. Juno was pretty good and her story (Cody's) is inspiring.

The Oscars always inspire me. I always want to write more, to polish my scripts, to give it another try. I'm a strange cat. I get encouraged and discouraged pretty quickly. I've submitted stories to blogs, screenplays to studios and contests, photographs to books and contests, and developed a reality show concept. I've also churned out a novel and short plays. Nothing's really lead to anything and it makes me wonder if I really am a hack. Of course I've also had teachers, a producer, and others compliment me. I had a script shopped around, albeit briefly, and
nothing came of it either. Well, nothing except the fact that I really didn't write anything for a long time and I haven't really finished a screenplay since then.

That was about seven years ago.

The Oscars always inspire me, just like going to the show to watch a good movie. It's just tough to get motivated, especially with so much else going on. I am the King of rationalization and the Lord of Excuses.

Monday (2.25.)

Monday was just a shitty day. I was dropping things, messing things up, the laundry seemed to take forever to finish. I was getting calls from St. Jerome's about my baptismal certificate and playing phone tag with my mom. A few other things happened that I can't remember, a CD wouldn't play, the DVR acted up, the Internet was being flaky, anyway it was just a crappy morning.

Things got a little better when Melissa got home from work. We went to Target to pick up some things and we decided to pick up our Club Wedd package. They also gave us a scanner to zap whatever we wanted to put in our registry. That was a bad idea, but it was fun. Actually Melissa was good about zapping things we needed or would need in the future. I, on the other hand, scanned in an X-Box 360 Elite system. Hahahaha. I'll probably feel like a jerk if anyone does actually get us that...

but I'll get over it.

We were having fun and got what we needed and decided to head out. While we were in line there was a young, attractive lady behind us. She seemed to be of Indian or Pakistani decent. She was well dressed and on the phone. It was actually a little annoying, but whatever, I got to shoot things. Anyway, there were some long line and someone opened up another register. I usually stay put when that happens, besides we had a lot of crap, she zoomed over to register right behind some guy who raced in front of her. The guy was empty handed but his "wife" and kid walked over. I didn't think much of it, except that it was a clown shoes thing to do. I stayed in line and waited.

A few moments later, there was a commotion in that line. I don't know how it happened but the man was getting into it with the young lady. He was swearing at her, and she didn't take it lightly. She gave it right back to him. The "couple" had a kid that was like buried under a coat or something and I think the girl mentioned it and the dude didn't like it. He was being a real jerk. I think the most she said was like call him a loser and told him to get a job. At some point she even offered him money or something and that really pissed him off. Now, not to be prejudice or anything, but this guy looked like a gang-banger p.o.s. Vulgar, ignorant, and just a walking cliche. I was torn, as I have been in the past, when things like this happen. It wasn't getting violent but it was getting loud. Then the asshole started calling her a terrorist, a hindu, and a whole bunch of other very offensive things. The cashier(s) didn't do anything. The douche bag's wife didn't, and I have no idea where security was.

The guy walked off after paying and I was right behind him for a second. He was still mumbling shit as he walked away. On the ride home we talked about it and I kind of felt like shit about it. I've been in several situations like these before, eight times out of ten, I'll say something. Seriously, I've done it before. I'm a big guy and I'm not skerred. However, being that I was with Melissa, I felt that I couldn't do anything to endanger ourselves. Futhermore, where was security? Lastly, it didn't get physical, if it did I would've definitely done something.

It's tough, I don't have children, but when I do, I'm sure I'll be even less inclined to intervene on the behalf of strangers. Then again, what kind of example would I be if I don't do something? I guess it depends on the situation.

I don't know, it reminded me of a couple of similar situations which I think I've written about before. One was something that happened to a "friend" of mine. He was in the car with his family and they were heading downtown. They had stopped for a light and noticed a commotion in a parking lot. There was a man grappling with a woman outside of her car. Now this is in the middle of the day, broad daylight. People driving and probably walking by. The father wanted to pull into the lot to see what he could do, however the mother feared for him and her kids and made him drive off. I don't think there were any cell phones back then, so they couldn't call 911. Besides they lived in a bad neighborhood and no one wants to be a snitch. So they drove off and who knows what happened.

The other one involved me. This was probably about ten years ago now. I was at a concert with some friends of mine and my brother and sister. My siblings were up in the stands, I was on the floor close to the stage. Now, the concert was the Smoking Grooves Tour, not that it matters but it sets the scene. I was surrounded by a lot of stoned, gang-bangers and wannabes. I probably blended in as well, but my point is that other than looking like them, I probably wasn't like them. I wasn't carrying a weapon (they didn't search at this venue back then) or affiliated with a gang. Anyway, long story short, this guy started to grope a friend of mine. She turned around and confronted him and he had a laugh along with his buddies. She told me and pointed him out, I glanced over there, and she convinced me to find our other friend and just walk away from them. I don't remember if we left or just finished watching the show from the back. Anyway, it was the safest and most prudent thing to do. It just didn't sit well with me.

I wanted to go up to the guy and clock him in the back of the head. At the very least say something, or ask him to apologize. I would've gotten my ass kicked. There weren't many security guards, at least none that I saw, and I was pretty much all by myself. My brother was probably like 13 or 14 and he was too far away anyway. I don't know, I still regret not doing something that day.

I'm rambling on now, but here's the kicker about the whole thing. Last night there was a show on ABC about people doing the right thing or walking away. They had someone hitting a car and taking off, some girls bullying another girl, and a racist employee refusing to serve someone because she was Muslim. It was pretty shocking how some people not only didn't defend her, they praised the guy. It was also nice to see a lot of people standing up for her. Again it was inspiring, but it also made me feel worse about Monday.

No one's perfect I guess. It makes me think though and I'm reminded of one of my favorite lines...

"I don't regret the things I've done, only those I did not do."

I've got to get going, thanks for reading, I'll catch you guys soon.

Tags: engagement, m, oscars, the rp, wedding, writing

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