Gil (fenyx) wrote,

Up to Speed

Ugh, I have like a million things I should be doing but I can't seem to get my ass up to do any of them. I couldn't sleep last night, like a lot of nights I guess, so I finished reading Breathers. Awesome. I'm glad I gave it a chance, it's a quick read if anyone is interested. It's sad, I was going to write a post about how messed it is that I related so much to a character...who happens to be an undead zombie. Maybe I'll still get around to it, but there are themes common to a lot of other stories, not fitting in, feeling like you're not dead, but not truly alive. I actually found the story similar to fight club in a lot of regards...anyway moving on.

I should be getting ready for work.

Having dogs gets annoying sometimes, don't me wrong I love them, but I miss the ability to just get up and go. I've got to walk them before I go and Kong 'em. (for those of you not familiar with the term - basically I fill these toys of theirs called Kongs with peanut butter to keep them quiet while I leave) Hmm....what else?

As you may have gathered, I got a new toy, I don't want it to seem like I'm showing off, I hate people like That was another post I was going to make, I just going to rave about my iPhone, ask about what apps to get, etc. Hell I've had a hard time just deciding what icons to keep on the first page/window. I didn't really want it at first, well when it first came out, hell yeah I wanted it, but anyway I told Melissa not to get it for me but she did anyway. I don't know, don't get me wrong I love it. It is the miracle phone like people have called it, but I just feel...I don't know, guilty about having it. I'm broke as hell and the way the year's been going I just don't feel like I "deserve" it. I'm strange, what can I say?

I should be applying to school.

Another post I was going to get around to was about my mom. I still don't feel like it, and frankly, I don't have the time at the moment. But it's been over a month now and I still haven't done it so I probably won't. At least not in any detail, but I guess I should mention something. Back in February, Valentine's Day to be exact, my sister called me saying that our mom was really sick and threw up blood. That sick and she still didn't want to go to the hospital or call 911. *sighs* Yeah...luckily Melissa and I managed to convince her to call or else we were going to. She was pretty bad...I don't remember the specifics but she basically had less than half the blood she was supposed to have in her system. I won't get into details...just because...but it was pretty bad. She was in the ER for a while then ICU for a couple of days. They ran every test possible on sucked. It sucks feeling so helpless, so useless, and seeing someone in pain like that. We tried to keep my dad from seeing a lot of it, he's a whole other's a long story, she in the hospital about ten days but is okay at the moment. She's back at work (a whole other story) and seems to be doing okay.

There was a lot I was going to touch on in regards to her stay. How some of the staff was great and how others were so fuckin' unprofessional and/or total assholes. How one of her roommates had MRSA, how some drama ensued because of who was visiting her and why...ugh...but whatever, she's better now, I'm happy and it is what is.

I should be paying my bills.

What else? Melissa's on Spring Break next week and we're thinking of hitting up the east coast. Philly, DC, Baltimore, not sure how many days and exactly where but we're working on it. I feel guilty about that too, like our money could be going to better things, God, I don't think there's much I don't feel guilty or bad about these days. It's more than Catholic guilt at this point, heh. I start working full time in May, it's good pay and good hours. M-F 7-3:30, union job, so hopefully I can dig myself out of my hole, unfrotunately it might only be seasonal for the summer. I'll burn that bridge when I get to it.

I should be taking a shower.

Speak of the devil, that was just the folks on the line. Mom was asking me if I'm coming over tomorrow. I guess we'll go for a little bit, I was going to visit them today before work but I Damn iPhone/Internet/TV. Eh, I don't feel like making a big deal out of anything this year.

I should be making myself some lunch.

Oh lastly, lastly? Does that sound correct? Who's married to an English teacher? Anyway, umm...last but not least. I need everyone's phone number, that is if I ever had it and/or you would like me to have it...or whatever. My Blackjack finally "broke" last month, I say "broke" because it happened while I was in the hospital. I happened to be in the basement with my mom while she was getting x-rays, or catscans, or an MRI, I forget which it was at the time. Anyway I was also interviewing and talking to people about jobs at the time. I couldn't leave to go anywhere, and the reception was horrible, something had to give and I had a moment. I snapped. I slammed the phone into the ground, after having like three calls drop, and I went for a long walk. So yeah, it was a total loss, I lost everyone's leave me a msg, email me, call me, text me whatevs...

I really have to go now.

I also changed my layout, tags, and stuff a little bit. Thanks Grace, I did some spring cleaning or whatever too. Anyway thanks for reading, I think that's about it for now...


Tags: fam, mom, money, sick, to do, v-day, work

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