Gil (fenyx) wrote,
Gil
fenyx

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I don't expect any of you to read this long ass entry...

Where the hell do I begin? Work sucks, people keep calling in or falling down, or not working, I feel like I'm the only one working sometimes. I know it's not true but when I'm the only one answering phones, dealing with the kids, trouble-shooting the computers, and keeping the school locked down at the front desk it gets frustrating. That seems to be the best word to describe me as of late.

Frustrated.

So I get out of work and drive downtown to pick up pops. He asked me about work and I let him have it. He actually gave me a pretty good speech, he's always been supportive of me in this way, we don't do lovey dovey type shit, but he straight up told me to quit. I'm young he says, I don't have a wife or kids to support. I won't be paying rent and I can go back to school or find something else. He means it too, I've done it before. When I worked for Viacom, aka Blockbuster Entertainment, I was making a LOT MORE than I am now, but it was killing me. Working like 50+ hour weeks, then going to school full time, I was insane. So fucking busy, I can never go back to retail, which is why I like my job now. The way I look at it, in retail the customer is always right, at work now, the student is always wrong. LOL. Anyway, it was a good talk, I mean I got lectured too, don't get me wrong, about going back to school, making some changes in my life and setting "goals". Ah yes goals, we all know what that's about.

He also told me to be more patient, that not everyone is going to "get" things as fast as I do, and that people get sick, especially at their/his age. Patience is not a trait I possess. Back to the goals.

Don't get me wrong I have them, but it's getting close to my deadline and I haven't accomplished them...yet. I don't know, as depressed, frustrated, and pissed off as I have been lately...I'm feeling kind of inspired right now, slightly optimistic even.

It won't last.

Real quick I'm going to spit out some of my so-called goals/dreams.

Watch a movie I wrote on the big screen
and/or see something I wrote become a best seller
Attend the Oscars. (don't care about nominations, really I don't)
Go to the MTV Movie Awards
Marry, have kids, the whole deal
Watch a game in every MLB and NFL stadium
Host Saturday Night Live
Be involved in at least one WWE Event
Learn guitar
Visit Stonehedge
Visit Egypt
Visit China
Travel I guess, LOL
Be the writer on a comic (preferably Punisher)
An OCC Chopper
An H2
A Red Ferrari Testarossa
Play in the Rock N Jock games, any and/or all sports
Bears tickets for life


Ok, I have more, and I don't know how realistic these are, but I'm rambling now. Probably sound real materialistic too, but I like to dream, sue me. Someday's it's all I got, you know :(. Of course my up didn't last too long. I worked on my site, added some more pics.

http://www.geocities.com/hyfivingmf/pics.html

Also added a bunch of more icons here for my LJ. Then to take a break I jumped into EQ. All I can say is that the game is fucking bullshit. I might quit. I'm in PC leveling with a great group when I go Linkdead. Fucking happens at least once a session, I hurry back after all the BS loading to find myself drowning. Of course I have no idea where I am and how I got there. Some people tried helping me but I died like two more times looking, I finally logged off pissed off as hell, but not surprising because, alas, this is my life.

It never gets better does it?

I know it's not a big deal but fuck it, maybe this is the kick in the ass I need to finally just quit all this MMPORPG BS or whatever it's called. Save some money, not waste it on TSO, where BTW everyone has now somehow moved out of my lot, Castillo DeNoriega is empty save for me. And friggin EQ I got thinking we were all going to be grouping, yeah that really happened. There is just, well there. So I don't know, what do you think? If you're still reading this.

I guess I don't understand.

Hmm...anything else? Guess not, I thought this was going to be a huge entry but I guess I got through what needed to be said pretty quickly, well 20 minutes isn't bad I guess. Bibby if you're reading this, hang in there. Everyone else, how ya doin'? Sorry I haven't been myself.

Alright good night one and all, hit me back, let me know you love me...or hate me, whichever.
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