Gil (fenyx) wrote,
Gil
fenyx

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Everything changes

Where to begin? It's almost been a month, I've been jotting notes here and there, but haven't posted.


Let's see, my new tatt's about a month old now, I chopped off my hair, school started, so I'm back to work.

Right off the bat, the first day back we had one of our girls get jumped in front of the school. They did a number on her with empty beer bottles, the first bell hadn't even rung yet. Savages. Other than that, it's the same shit at work. I've kind of promised myself I'm not going to deal with the same shit this year, staying late, people's problems, I don't need them. I'm also going to try to just stick to hanging with the crew, no more trying to be the big man on campus. If I don't know them by now, who needs 'em.

I've also been watching a lot of movies lately. The Terminal, The Punisher, The Count of Monte Cristo, The Royal Tenenbaums, 28 Days Later, and a few others. Lots of quotes I jotted down...

"He's everything I'm not."

"Life is a storm. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes. Shout as you did in Rome. Do your worst! For I will do mine!"

"I've always been considered an asshole for about as long as I can remember. That's just my style."

So I've been going to some parties, hitting some shows, trying to work out here and there. The problem is that whenever I get into any sort of routine I start feeling like shit. Whether it be soreness, or getting weak, or ill, or "other". It blows. Speaking of the park, we went to the batting cages the other day and there were some "ladies" that made me look like a woman. I probably sound like an asshole but Jesus, is it standard issue to get the short haircut and rainbow stickers? Not to mention to scowl at every heterosexual male that comes across your path.

There were a few "flag" football games going on as well. Flag football is the gay. Yet, I understand why it's played, as one gets older, it's easier to get hurt...I guess. I really miss playing sometimes, everything about it, even the taping up. Putting your crap clothes on and braving the weather. Just hitting someone, and getting hit, a little pain is always good, it's lets you know you're alive.

I really need to write more.

It seems like I'm rarely happy, but I have my moments. When I'm watching the Cubs win. When I'm playing baseball, or in the cages. There's no feeling quite like hitting a ball on the screws, just hitting that sweet spot. Well, hitting that 'other' sweet spot is pretty good too, but I digress. Watching a good flick, listening to some good music. Local H shows. The moments are just too few and too far in between.

That reminds me, big show on friday at the Metro, you better be there. I need to pick up tickets. A couple of weeks ago I went to see them in DeKalb at Otto's. It was a great f'ing time. I drove up with live2cd and we met up with some others at bettydiamond's place. It's always strange being back in DeKalb. Feels like home, but not. I don't know if it ever was. The show fuckin' rocked. Great set, good crowd, saw a lot of familiar faces and saw Suffrajett! If you haven't heard of this band you need to check them out. After the show I found Simi, the lead singer, and I told her that they blew me away. Afterwards I had to head back to the Chi, what a drive, for about twenty miles the fog was so thick you couldn't see five feet in front of you.

I didn't make it to Germanfest this weekend. Fucking sucks, I was soooo looking forward to it, same as every year. Unfortunately I'm starting to realize that nothing's really the same every year, everything changes...

So have I. Hopefully for the better.


Check it out-> http://pics.livejournal.com/fenyx/

I'm audi-five thousand.
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